Subaru Impreza GC8 & RS Forum & Community banner

1 - 18 of 18 Posts

·
The first ex-ex-moderator!
00 RS & GSX-R 750
Joined
·
1,446 Posts
Discussion Starter #1
TOP 12 THINGS NOT TO SAY TO A COP

1. I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer.

(OK in Texas)

2. Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged
in.

3. Aren't you the guy from the Village People?

4. Hey, you must've been doin' about 125 mph to keep up with me.
Good job!

5. Are You Andy or Barney?

6. I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be
a police officer.

7. You're not gonna check the trunk, are you?

8. I pay your salary!

9. Gee, Officer! That's terrific. The last officer only gave me a
warning, too!

10. Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.

11. I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there are no
other cars around. That's how far ahead of me they are.

12. When the Officer says "Gee Son....Your eyes look red, have you been
drinking?" You probably shouldn't respond with, "Gee Officer your eyes
look glazed, have you been eating doughnuts?"
 

·
Registered
2001 STM Sedan
Joined
·
455 Posts
LOL!! that's fuggin GREAT!
 

·
Registered
05 LGT limited
Joined
·
405 Posts
Best ways to go to jail...


1. Suggest to the cop that if he had any idea of how to drive, he wouldn't need that big radio to catch speeders!

2. Suggest that if he wasn't high as a kite on glazed donuts, he might be a better judge of speed.

3. "Sure, I'll give you my license and registration, but first you gotta pull my finger."

4. Cop: "Do you know why I pulled you over?"
You: "Cause your lonely and wanted to talk?"

5. Cop: "Do you have any idea how fast you were going?"
You: "Yeah, do you have any idea how long it took me to get going that fast, asshole?!"

6. Stage a backfire contest outside of an ATF controlled hostage situation.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
142 Posts
driving 100+ in GA not ATL like backwards GA
pulled over by I swear to god Boss Hog with mirror sunglasses.
Cop: Son, no one goes through Gorgia that fast.
Me: Sherman did.

Let's just say is was a long nite, and my knowing a congressman is the only way I'm not dead today.
 

·
Registered
2001 STM Sedan
Joined
·
455 Posts
Faraz said:
driving 100+ in GA not ATL like backwards GA
pulled over by I swear to god Boss Hog with mirror sunglasses.
Cop: Son, no one goes through Gorgia that fast.
Me: Sherman did.

Let's just say is was a long nite, and my knowing a congressman is the only way I'm not dead today.
whoa...talk about having some balls
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
122 Posts
I got pulled over, with no thanks to my crappy RE-92's. How was I supposed to know they would loose grip and start to squeel like mad when I took that 90 deg turn at 40 mph:D
The cop was really cool though and let me go with just a warning
I love cool cops, we definately need more of the cool ones

Mike:checkit:
 

·
Premium Member
overdeveloped beater
Joined
·
8,335 Posts
I find it gratifying to adress them not as sir, but as the rank they wear. If they are a luitenant, I'll call them sir, but if they are a patrolman, that's what I call em. Fuck that sir shit! They eat it up to boost their power trip. Course, you have to be tactful when talking to them but for the most part, they're just a person in a uniform doing a job. Why not be the person they remember for that day?
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
79 Posts
...and don't tell 'em you were speeding so you could get home before throwing up all the beer you've been drinking.:barf:
tasteycow
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
4 Posts
driving 100+ in GA not ATL like backwards GA
pulled over by I swear to god Boss Hog with mirror sunglasses.
Cop: Son, no one goes through Gorgia that fast.
Me: Sherman did.
Let's just say is was a long nite, and my knowing a congressman is the only way I'm not dead today.

Ben Affleck's (sp?) brother told this same story on Leno a few weeks back..........

Anyways, it's damn funny!!


Dave
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
4 Posts
Faraz,

Not doubting you at all..........
Just when I read your post, I remembered hearing the story...
And it's still pretty damn funny!!

Dave
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
19 Posts
I was scared sheetless the first time i got pulled over it was on a highway at 12:30 in the morning I pulled out of a walmart all fine and dandy I was doin 90 up a windy fourlane highway and this car comes up behind me well he's following me for a while then I htink hmm maybe this guy wants to see what he can do. so i'm pullin a little over a hundred when the lights flash on. I was damn near shittin bricks. I was usin my two lanes of the highway all they way up this road. and now i'm gettin pulled over. I had a junior liscence and leagaly wasn't sposed to be out after 11. Well the cop comes up the car I roll down my window the convo went something like this.
Cop: do you know why I pulled you over?
Me::eek: n-n-n-no sir i don't.
Cop: Well you sure seemed to tear ass out of that walmart back there.
Me: (thinking tear ass? I didn't even burn rubber, ok maybe a little but still...) is that all sir?
cop: well you were goin a little fast up this road here usin both lanes of the highway, thats reckless driving right there.
Me: (thinking fast? hell I damn near doubled the speed limit) oh...
Cop: so where you guys comin from/going to (my girlfreind was with me x that is)
Me: well we just came from dinner back there a ways(which we did but that was 2 no 3 hours ago)
Cop: well can I see your liscence and registration and insurance card?
me: yes but I don't have my insurance card it's in the mail.
Girlfreind gets them out I hand them to the cops he takes forever in his car to trace all of it.
comes back
cop: well I'm just gonna issue you a warning you two get home now and drives safely.
me: thank you, yes I will.(thinking:drive safe? always safe..a lil fats but safe)
any way the moral of the story is be nice and act dumb and look all i got was a warning my ass would of lost my liscence wreckless driving, endangerment of others, speeding, driving after curfew. damn either he was having a goodnight or my girlfreind made it good cause she was wearin a short ass tight mini skirt with her legs crossed any shorter and I think those thongs of hers would of been peaking out. Yes I know it was a long stpry but hey It's 12:30 and I ain't tired.:D :sunny:
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
36 Posts
thats phunny.

I had a number 4 once.

coming home from work on my bike one 35 degree early morning. Hit the highway, put the chin on the tank, wicked it up to about 110mph for several miles unknowingly while I was putting the chin down he got me (only) doing 68:lol: but did'nt catch me till about 10 miles later when I was slowly coming into town. He asked if I wa going at a high rate of speed. I said it was cold and I wanted to get home:p

I got the ticket for 68.
 
1 - 18 of 18 Posts
Top